Getting to "Good Enough"

Lately I have been learning and trying to practice this concept of "good enough".

You see, I am a perfectionist.  Meaning, it is extremely hard for me to switch tasks until the one I have started is perfect.  Thus, what takes some 1 hour may take me 3 hours. I can get lost in little, insignificant details easily. Additionally, because my mind is set on perfection, I often procrastinate because I am afraid of failing... and by failing, I mean not being or doing something perfect.  Oh, I almost forgot; I also tend to set unrealistic goals for myself. Now, I'm a believer in pushing yourself and never giving up, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about literally setting unrealistic goals (example: I will lose 25 pounds by next week) I also tend to run low on patience, I need everything to happen NOW. And as you may can tell, I am my harshest critic. 

I was talking to a mentor a few weeks ago and she said something that touched my soul.  She said "Brenda, you have to find what good enough is for you, because you can't be perfect, you will fail every time and be miserable your whole life." It sounded great, but in my head I thought "I don't do this good enough thing... it's either perfect or its not".  She told me to take some time and define what good enough looks like for me in every area of my life and then strive for that each day. Ironically, I put that task on my already overstuffed to do list.  Her idea sounded great, but as soon as I left I quickly was consumed trying to sort out how to accomplish all the tasks on my to do list, and of course do them perfectly.  I was frustrated to say the least and understandably so. Like always I had piled an unrealistic amount of to dos on my list and was determined to get everything done.  About halfway through the list, and with the early morning hours rapidly approaching, I just gave up. I felt defeated. So I turned on the radio and started winding down for bed.  I had a pen in hand ready to write my to do list for the next day. I really didn't even want to write it because it would have to include all the things that I had failed to do that day plus whatever else I needed to do the next day. I had it visualized in my head and it was long and complex.  Right before I began writing. A song came on the radio, one that I had heard many times but never had payed close attention to the words. Here it is:

Tears filled by eyes.  An enormous burden was lifted.  Instead of writing down my to do list, I just began writing and here is what ended up on the paper:

I found an unexplainable peace.  I found comfort knowing I did not have to be perfect. I also found comfort in knowing that I am loved unconditionally by the one who is perfect.  I sat in awe for a while and then I flipped over the paper and did what my mentor had suggested.  I wrote down what good enough was.  I suggest all you perfectionists out there do the same.  I think good enough is going to look different for everyone.  Don't view it as "settling" because that is not what it is.  It's something to look at when you are having a hard time and realize you did whatever it was good enough, and most importantly that you are good enough.  

Additionally,  I have implemented a few other changes to my thought processes.  

1.  Instead of making a to do list, at the end of the day I write down everything I accomplished.  It always is much more than I thought, and it is both rewarding and satisfying.  (Oh, and it always meets my "good enough" standard.)

2.  At the end of that list, I write down three positive things about myself and three positive things about life.  It sounds silly, but by writing it down, it forces me to stop being so hard on myself.  

3.  At the very bottom of the page, I write down the following:  I am not Perfect. I am Forgiven. 

My prayer for each of you reading this is that you realize how extremely loved you are and not only that you are loved, but that you are forgiven and that perfection is not needed, because we live under grace and mercy.